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When to assert authority

When to assert authority


The optimal time and place to assert authority is when we are confident that doing so is in everyone’s best interest.


The reasons we don’t assert authority are numerous.  Three of them are:

-allowing others to have their process

-fear that asserting our authority will anger others

-fear of the pain of acknowledging past mistakes


It’s a fine line of discernment to determine what behavior is destructively enabling and what behavior is beneficially supportive.  On the one hand we don’t want to interfere with another’s free will and process.  On the other hand we feel an obligation to help reduce suffering where we can.  That’s why we need to be as confident as possible that asserting our authority is in everyone’s best interest.  It can take time and research to get there.

Most people don’t want to be told what they can and cannot do.  Explaining with genuine care why asserting authority is everyone’s best interest minimizes anger.

Using our authority brings up times when we failed to do so, when we sat on the sidelines when we could have made things better for everyone.  We need  to accept the pain of those lost opportunities to move forward.  Allow the self reproach of past mistakes to be healed through acceptance.

Asserting our authority in a manner that benefits everyone, by definition, improves everyone’s life.


Thinking creates our life.  I offer thought coaching to improve thinking and therefore life.

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